& not-so deep secrets
huiting says hi
Welllllll this is the public blog, so the things written here should be more-or-less stomach-able. ;) So I guess this is where I say the mandatory line:
This blog documents the thoughts and growth process of:
A free soul roaming the world in search of some meaning to life.
Pretty sure that's not the exact way I phrased it when I had my old blog skin but WTV HAHA.
Oooooh wait I think I wrote it as "lonely soul" instead of "free soul". But hey guys I've grown out of that emoshitz phase already alright ;)
人生就是要盡情地瘋 ／ I am a free soul.
more of me
Naruto: Hokage Funeral Theme (Guzheng) youtube instagram Facebook twitter & my dearest Ting Ting
Thursday, September 29, 2011 @ 10:18 PM
Hi laptop. I am going to miss you.
You will stay in my mind for a very long time. This is the last post that I am going to type on you. Please remember that you have been my constant companion for the past year. You know so many of my secrets. I've listened to music on you. I've talked to a friend that I haven't talked to for a very long time on you. You are quite important to me.
But as all things do, it's time to let go. You will have to serve another owner next year. Till then, I hope that you can remember me too. The countless times that I've opened you and stroked your keys. I hope that you will be able to serve your new owner as well as you served me, if not better.
Thank you for existing. Thank you for finding your way to me.
You may look old; your keys may look forlorn and yellow. But you are still the best computer I've ever had in my life, and remember - you are not at all slow. Looks are deceiving. You are brilliant. Thank you for being such a huge part of my life for this past year! I will miss you.
@ 9:12 PM
I am a person who is very much affected by the loss of something D: An item. A pen. Even if it is something that is seemingly insignificant. I will be more or less distraught by it. Irritated. Angry. Annoyed. Angry. Downcast. Weird that such small events can actually affect me so much. Argh.
I'll keep brooding over it. And I will be in a damn bad mood because of it. Argh. Screw it. I dislike the feeling of losing something. If it's a guitar pick or something, it's fine. Easily replaceable. (then again I'm not saying that I'd not mind losing guitar picks once every few days argh I would seriously be freaking irritated by that and be in a bad mood ._.) Damn. And now my thumbdrive is in God knows where. Sigh. Has anyone seen it? D: In the class? On the teacher's table? Arghh. Damn it.
And I'd swear a lot. Bad habit, really. But seriously. I really can't stand it. Losing things especially when I need to use them. Pens, especially. What a waste of money. Argh.
^$#^%DF@#QVF$%D#QWAGSTDFSXGFDSa Sian lah.back to top?
Wednesday, September 28, 2011 @ 9:19 PM
Love in the past
I need my rapidly disappearing childhood D: It's like that part of me who was once obliviously happy is slowly being strangled by the realities of life. She's choking. Dying. Wrenched away from this world D: And this is what I fear the most):
Like that passage said, sometimes we get too burdened by the realities of the world - and forget what it's like to be happy over simple things. It's been so long since I looked forward to something. So long since I've been excited at the prospect of doing something. D: Where has the child me gone? Why do I have to thrust her aside in my journey of growing up and discovering more about the world, and of myself?
It's so hard to really think like a child now. It's not really in me any more. But there's still bits of it there, that I'm trying real hard to retain.
Don't let go of your childhood too easily. D:back to top?
Monday, September 26, 2011 @ 9:02 PM
Dedicated to you.
Don't worry - keep trying.
I once was unable to put others before myself. Whatever I did was purely out of selfish reasons. "If I did this, that person would repay me in the future!"
I try not to think consciously about getting repayment for whatever I did.
But I can't help it if I continued thinking about it subconsciously.
Regardless, I perservered. I believed that someday - I don't know how far in the future that day may be - my habit will turn into something that is real. I had the will to be good. And that was all I had to work on. But I persevered; I wanted to be good. And it is, I believe, starting to happen now.
This is just like how emotions and relationships can be fostered, over time. It's not so much as the love you have for each other. That romantic obsession fades, after a while. However, if you have the will to love that somebody, to continue giving support to that somebody, then your "love" can sustain. You choose to love.
You choose to be good, too.back to top?
@ 8:31 PM
One down, a few more to go, it's a journey that's never on hold
I have finished studying about Singapore's National Identity! And have successfully compiled notes on it for the essay question in the Humanities exam(: This is good! Right now I just have to go through it again to remember the key points in my head, and I will be done with it for good! (: Next up - the compilation of notes for the conflict in Northern Ireland!
P.S. You know I have a very strong feeling that in the EOYs the question that they will set on the cultivation of national identity will be regarding public housing O: Is there public housing in Japan? Hm. Perhaps not. But I don't think they will really make the question such that it really caters to both case studies bah... As long as we are able to use one case study for the example, it would be good enough already, isn't it. And furthermore the teachers have went through this in class for quite a couple of times. Oh well. And national symbols and education have already been set for the two block tests we sat for throughout the course of this year. So it can't be them. Or else it'd be too easy. So I presume it would be on public housing :D Anyway, good luck all with your examinations! Don't worry too much; it's all in your head. You have learnt it before, and understood it before, so don't panic and think "Oh my God I still have so much more crap to revise; I have forgotten everything that Mdm Suzana has taught!" because it is not true because it's still in you! Like what Nicole said, the part of the brain that functions in the learning and absorbing of information cannot work properly under stress, or perhaps not even function at all. In other words, don't freak out if not you will die. Yes, that's all for now, bye bye!(:back to top?
Saturday, September 24, 2011 @ 12:31 PM
Yes, you areYou are in control of your own destiny. Yes, you are. back to top?
@ 12:15 PM
I feel different. Weird. Not the usual thing. So weird. So weird. ...
I am going to watch F1 later! So exciting.
Apparently we can walk around the whole pitch, and view all the various exhibitions for free! And there'll be singers singing too, like Linkin Park and Shakira O: Omg man. No wonder people are willing to get the tickets for $275 each. Sounds like a rip-off, but you are actually benefitting from it :D
Haha my mother and I have got free tickets! Because my brother is performing at the floating platform, as one of the shows. This is cool! I really anticipate going there, actually :D Even though the exams are just round the corner.
Speaking of which, I seem to lack the motivation to study. The exams are just another set of test papers for us to complete. It doesn't feel like anything much. Perhaps it's due to the many Chapter tests that we have sat for this year; they make tests seem so average. Like nothing. Oh well. There's one and a half weeks left! Doesn't seem that big a deal leh. Oh well. I wonder how I'll do. It's the same for Block Test 2. I didn't really care a lot about it. It's just.. Nothing much lorh. Just another exam. Just another test. It won't affect me that much. But I wonder if that's the correct attitude that I should be having :/
Maybe all my thoughts and reflections about how the examinations are just something the teachers to use to check if we've really learnt over the past year is finally getting to me. But it's a bit too much, if you know what I mean. I think I'm overharping on it O: But I'm sorry, it seems to be a part of me already. I don't think I'll even get nervous before and exam any more. Sigh. I want that adrenaline rush! That feel of sitting an important paper. I want to feel excited over it. Even though I've managed to convince myself thoroughly that academic results won't affect my life. Sigh. Gah. I want to study; I want to feel the thrill of taking a big exam. But then something in me just ain't coorperating :/ Gah. But that part of me is still me though. So I should be able to control it. Argh. One and a half weeks left. Damn it Hui Ting just feel the freaking thing. Argh. Time passes so quickly. Not under my control. I want to feel meaning in my life. Exams are meaningful. They are. I want to answer the questions confidently!
Shit what's wrong with me.back to top?
Friday, September 23, 2011 @ 7:59 PM
The light despises me.
I seek to be alone,
I welcome cold.
Thursday, September 22, 2011 @ 9:33 PM
A small peek into me.
I was never - and still am not - the kind of person who would sit by and be vulnerable, or weak. It's just not in me to do that. Even in extreme conditions, when it's a life-or-death situation out there in the cold or something, I would never allow someone to worry over me or pamper me like I am weak. Not really. Even if I did, it would just be an act. And I would hate myself for it, and snap out of it after a while.
I know some guys like that kind of girls who seem vulnerable and small. This instinct to protect would somehow spring up inside them. But for me, I won't be the one who needs protection. I'll be the strong one, the cool one. I suppose it's just me. It's just not in me to sit there and watch as they take care of me. I'd much rather take care of others.
Sure, I admit, sometimes it's cool to see the guys do the work for you. Like they are true gentlemen, waiting to serve this lady. It feels great that there's this person who actually does things for you, you know? All the physical work. But then again, that only constitutes a very small portion of the time. Most of the time I'd just sit there and survey the scene and enjoy it for a while, but then I'll get up after a moment to be a part of the work force too. I can't just sit there and be like that as they pamper over me, you know :/
Well this has been quite a personal post! I'm surprise that I'm even posting it here. But then again, only you few people know my url, and only you few people will read my blog, so it doesn't really matter(:
Soft toy day's tomorrow! I'm quite happy :Dback to top?
Monday, September 19, 2011 @ 9:29 PM
Stop over-stressing yourself.
"I SEE-ED YOUR STATUS!! ME WANT, ME WANT, ME WANTTTTTTTTTT. Nom, choke, nom nom, nom nom, skriek, nom nom nom nom nom."
Haha how I love this granddaughter of mine. <3
Well the cupcakes are baking now! They look nicer, but you can't judge a book by its cover. And I've noticed that a lot of my sentences rhyme nowadays. Without me thinking about it ._. What's with rhyming sentences argh. Must be the sudden infiltration of poems deep and dangerous into my head. But I'm glad to say that I'm finally using a wider ranger of vocabulary. Must be due to the incessant reading of Harry Potter.
I'm still hesitant to give Nicole back her sister's Goblet of Fire :x Seeing that I would not have the chance to read it in the near future. Argh. I do hope that she will allow me to extend my loan period to until the end of year examinations are over. Then I can pursue Harry Potter again at my leisure, and do whatever I want to do :D
Speaking of which, I must remind myself to start looking for a job immediately after the EOYs end. Or else there will not be any time left for me to do so ._. And I'd spend another December holiday whiling my time away. This is such a waste of precious time! I must get a job.
Oh, I must also be sure of when pop piano lessons would start :D The other day, I was looking at the notices showing the start of new lessons in September. I realised, with a leap of pleasure, that they actually had many pop piano lessons available! As in, there are actually a whole range of timings and dates that I could choose from! I guess I'll probably take the lesson from 1.30pm to 2.30pm. Then I can rest, and go for singing. Yay to my musical pursuits. I'm finally taking steps of my own to start living my own life the way I want it to be. Previously I was just woefully ignorant of the happenings around me. This time, though, it's different!
Hello, I'm back, I just went to check on my muffins. They look a tad too dry this time. I probably should have really measured out 1 and a half eggs rather than just estimate from the bowl :/ oh well. To each her own. Oh my mum just said that the aroma of the muffins is excellent! I still think it's not brown enough yet, though. So I set it to go for another 5 more minutes :D Yay.
I realised that there's this inner device in me that automatically cries out if I spend too much time playing instead of doing what I should be doing. It's hard to ignore. In fact, it's almost impossible to ignore, because it's really such an uncomfortable feeling. Argh. But it's good, in the sense that it will really get me back on track. For example, just now at 8 o'clock, I was attempting to do several things at once. To bake muffins, to check out facebook, to watch the television, and revise IH, Northern Ireland and Physics, Electromagnetic waves for tomorrow's quiz. Not a good thing to do. My thoughts were in a mess, my whole soul was flustered. Worrying about what I should do now, about how to do it, about what would happen if I leave the butter out for a too-long period of time. Would it become too soft? Too soggy? Causing the cake to be disgusting? Weird?
Oh no, what should I study for Physics tomorrow? And I said that I'd finish studying Northern Ireland today, but I can't concentrate! What should I do?! I need to study Northern Ireland now. Yes I need to. Shit there's Physics quiz tomorrow too. I must familiarise myself with the various wavelengths. Shit. The butter! It's melting. It's melting. Freak it's melting too quickly I can't finish studying everything before it melts. Oh God. Shit. Shit. God damn tv. What's on channel 5 tonight? I want to watch it! Oh it's that Channel U show about singing! Damn it. Northern Ireland. Damnit. Damnit. DAMNIT. MY TABLE IS IN A MESS. WHAT SHOULD I DO.
This is not a good feeling, I tell you. So never attempt to do everything at once. You will go crazy. Your mind's not big enough to accomodate all those thoughts and swirls and squiggly lines.
And so I packed everything away, turned off the television, stuffed the butter back into the fridge, and laid down my Physics textbook in front of me. Along with the worksheet that Miss Tan gave us on electromagnetic waves. And I began to study. Yay. And I succeeded in completing everything and understanding it, at 8.30. That's a damn good feeling, I tell you. Of knowing that you have at least accomplished something. I always feel proud after I've done homework seriously in a day. And this is exactly that kind of pride.
Now, the muffins are done, the table's cleared up, the dishes washed, the oven turned off. And it's time to go to bed after I pack my bag for tomorrow(: So tatas, all, and good nights.back to top?
Sunday, September 18, 2011 @ 9:45 PM
I'm just swaying to the music.
Swan lake is so nice! Tchaikovsky, Chopin, Beethoven, Mozart, Strauss! Nocturne!
The Secret Garden is so nice. Oh I love music. What will we all do without the classics. I want to watch a ballet again. Sadly I couldn't thoroughly enjoy Swan Lake and the Nutcracker because I was still too young. And because I was still too artfully-ignorant. Strange how these pieces of art can make you feel.
Okay I shall pack my bag and go to sleep now. I bought a new muffin tray! I will be baking muffins soon :D
Oh God, this reminds me so forcefully of that day a year ago when Xuan Li and I baked a rainbow cake at Li Shuen's house. Oh freak, that seems so long ago. A whole different era. Because the me is different now. Different goals, different dreams. A different life. So much more has entered my life and has taken the place of objects long since gone.
I love symphonies. The violin is an amazing instrument; why have I only realised it now? How heartwrenching it could be.
Moonlight Sonata is so woefully sad. Heavy and depressed.
I hear a lot of familiar songs here. All so familiar, all I've heard before, just that I don't know their names. Haha.
Music is so amazing! In its purest form!back to top?
Thursday, September 15, 2011 @ 9:42 PM
My magical world
Hi just a quick post before I go to sleep, then. Had just been googling existentialism, but what came up was like a load of old tosh. It makes it sound so complex and professional when it's just simple and straightforward. Oh well. I prefer my own understanding of existentialism than what the web says. Albeit if my understanding is wrong or is not entirely parallel to what it is actually defined as. Whatever. I like my way more :D
Had an excellent dream last night. Those of you who know will know that this is the kind of dreams I love 8D Where there is magic involved. Or some supernatural force. That I can control. It's damn freaking awesome because I can only feel magic in dreams. (okay, I sincerely hope that that sentence is not true). But back to the point, I dreamt that I was in a hurry/rush to find something! And I had to Apparate to somewhere. Most of 301 is there in the dream too, just that I remember Kellynn and Nicole extremely vividly. We were all learning to Apparate. And apparently I had to go somewhere, and I told Kellynn that I had to Apparate there. And Kellynn said "no you can't, you haven't passed your test yet" and while she and I were conversing we were heading off briskly towards somewhere, a classroom or waiting room - like thing. Our other classmates were there. And I was attempting to Apparate there, to practise, before I headed off to that place where I was going to go to. And I focused on a spot, thought about "determination", and spun on the spot. And nicole was like "oh my god Hui Ting you did it!" with her hands covering her mouth with that shocked and a little excited look. She was sitting down on a sofa in the "waiting room". Lol. And I tried a few more times, and succeeded each time, and told nicole or something that it isn't really that hard.
And that concludes the nice part of the dream, I can't remember the rest of the parts, haha.back to top?
Tuesday, September 13, 2011 @ 6:58 PM
I like poems and snickles and dreamworks and peas
For a moment, I visualised myself as one who has not yet known Harry. The book - what a mystery. That thick book, colourful, so familiar, yet so foreign.
Harry! My life and my soul.
Hurry - before it's too late.
Let me see your smile one last time. And I'll be gone. See you there.back to top?
Monday, September 12, 2011 @ 6:34 PM
I like blogging. These few days I've been blogging a lot, much more than usual. Perhaps because of the things available that I want to say. But then again, there could have been - actually, I'm sure that there was - things and events that I could blog about in the past, just that I overlooked them. I didn't care. And so I didn't blog.
Well right now it's back to the state of me where I care. You know, sometimes it's good to just stop right where you are, slow down and listen. Listen to the sounds around you. The magical blend of the different sounds that you usually just tune out. Listen. There's so much that can be seen from those sounds. Don't use your eyes. Close your eyes. And listen. Hear the calls of the birds in the wild. Listen to the mixture of voices near and far away; the delicate balance. Listen to the rustling of the leaves of the trees in the breeze. The ring of metal against metal as someone somewhere is cooking dinner in a pot. The footsteps of your family members, the happy voices of the children playing in the park downstairs.
There's so much to be heard, so much to be seen. And in this world, it is such a waste to just throw them all away. The power of hearing is amazing. Waves that you can't see, reaching you, and you sense it. You're able to identify it.
So close your eyes, and listen.back to top?
@ 6:16 PM
I just realised that "Uptown Girl" is so extremely applicable to Titanic.
"Uptown girl, she's been living in her uptown world
"She'll see I'm not so tough, just because, I'm in love with an uptown girl
"And now she's looking for a downtown man
Yes, that's why I say it's so applicable(: Maybe James Cameron got his idea from this song? Hm.back to top?
Sunday, September 11, 2011 @ 10:48 PM
Apologies for my previous post; it is quite incoherent and seemingly random. I'm sure you could have guessed from the non-existent flow that my thoughts were in quite a jumble.
Now I understand. It's not about being a hero. It's about being what everyone else needs. Because you can take it.
back to top?
@ 9:48 AM
Some things in life, you get it by pure luck.
Why do some things occur to others and not to oneself? Is it fated to do so? Does destiny exist? Is there someone up there or somewhere who actually has a book in his or her or its hand, pouring over the lives of the people who are living down here? The lives that they haven't lived yet, but which they will live, definitely in that direction. Does this thing called "fate" exist? I seriously don't know. But sometimes, sometimes. I turn to fate. Probably because I am afraid that it has happened because of the choices I've made. We're afraid of taking the risk, of going out there alone, without any divine intervention. We'd all like to think that it was planned out this way and hence it's meant to be like that. It's not because of us.
But what's the point?
Either fate exists or it doesn't. It can't exist and disappear whenever you feel like it. Yet sometimes you really want it to be because of fate that something happens. At other times, though, you feel triumph in the fact that it was because of your own choice that led to this particular consequence. This ending.
Life is so ironic.back to top?
Friday, September 9, 2011 @ 8:40 PM
It's good that I have this platform to deposit all my thoughts; a place where I can call my own! A place where I'm not forced to write, or post just for the sake of posting. Not posting just for other people too, but posting what I want and what I feel for myself, whenever I feel like it. It's a pleasant experience, actually, having something that you can truly call your own.
No one else uses it; no one can get access into it or touch it. It is yours and yours alone. This is the amazing feel of owning something :D You know, I had a dream last night. An extremely vivid dream. It feels so real that when I woke up, I was still in shock about what happened. Okay to be perfectly honest, I did not really have a good night last night, in the sense that I kept waking up. I reckon I woke up at least 4 times in the night. It doesn't feel like I have gone into deep sleep at all. Of course, this is not good for you, but surprisingly I was not very tired after those dreams. Perhaps because it was not so much as physical activities that I did in the dreams, but rather, the emotional waveforms. I could really feel it all. Such a strong feeling of loss.
My godfather, in the dream, would be dying in the future. I know he will die. Okay, to be frank, I was under the impression that he was Sirius Black. I was not Harry Potter, however. I'm still me. But somehow or other, Sirius Black became my godfather. And, my dream self knows that Sirius will die, because in the book, he died. That scene is really strongly etched in me. It was a moment of parting. I don't know where we were going to, but we were parting. And I ran at him and hugged him damn freaking tightly and didn't want to let go; I knew he was going to die and that he would be leaving me forever. But he's the most important thing to me, and I told him that while crying and hugging him. And he's tall so he lifted me off the ground in a real bear hug and I was hugging him like siao, grief weighing upon me and I never wanted to let go. And he was there comforting me, but hugging me tightly too. Then something happened - either I woke up and went back to sleep or something - but it wasn't the same scene any more. I was already with a group of Aurors which included Mad-eye Moody and Lupin (somehow I knew they were there) and Sirius was already in his dog form and he's already going to die. Okay the rest of the dream is not relevant because they were more dreamlike and unreal.
The only shocking part was the part where I hugged him. All those emotions I felt. Grief; loss. Pining. Love. Like I really loved him (as a parental and brother-ish figure) and that he's really the most important thing in my life. My parents weren't brought up at all; I suppose they weren't with me from the start, like Harry.
I suppose what happened was that I took Harry's experience, and sort of morphed it into my own. It's like I'm reading the book, just that I'm living it. Instead of reading about Harry, I'm me. It's weird cause I've never felt that way before. But yet my dreams enable me to feel it. This is the power of the mind. How you can truly convince yourself and believe that something is true, even though you haven't really went through it yourself. The power of empathy too. It enables me to know maybe not exactly, but fairly close enough to what Harry is feeling. This is empathy.
When I woke up I cried a few tears from the loss. Amazing, actually, that my brain can translate the words I read to a real experience. Like I've said before, magic exists - and it exists in the form of writing.
I don't have a godfather.back to top?
Thursday, September 8, 2011 @ 8:51 AM
OH hai I was just looking through the other blogs from a damn long time ago (aka two years ago) and I realised that that was really like eons ago O: My life has changed much! Really, by an amount uncountable. It's strange what growing up does to you. Every day is a lesson; once passed, it can't be forgotten. And so we should all look forward to all the days here, the we have right here right now.
Three years have passed since I first stepped into the Nanyang grounds, new as a stranger. I can still remember walking around the compound, stopping in front of the boards at the General Office and searching for my class. I was in 113. No other person I knew was there except for Ying Ying. To be honest, that wasn't really comforting. But still, I followed the crowd and walked with my Crumpler towards the Sec Ones' assembly area. And I sat behind a line of people who were to be my new classmates. I didn't know anyone, it was a little foreign.
But yet, I was already in Secondary school! Past the childishness - or so I thought - of Primary schools. We were thirteen. We were old. We were finally teenagers. And the first year passed by in a blur of lessons, after-school activities and exams. SYF '09. One of my proudest moments in Nanyang. I was a newbie, yet I was chosen to perform with the ensemble. It was just fate, I suppose, that Rainia wanted to go pursue fencing whole-heartedly instead of playing with the ensemble for SYF. And so, we achieved our Gold with Honours. I was so proud of us, but there was still something lacking somewhere; I did not know because I was still young. 13! It seemed magical but then again it's just so... Insignificant somehow. And I went for my guzheng exam and got my diploma. Strange it seems, that so much happened then. Hm. It seems like another me - far away in the past, weird because that me doesn't know what I know now.
Then the second year came. We were more used to the school's environment already. We were seniors! And this year is so much more familiar than the first year. Again, it passed by in a blur of moments. Seemingly faster than our first year. We had a new classroom, new deskies, life skills camp, exams, dramafest. Less action-packed. And I became good friends with ting ting(: This year wasn't that major, actually.
Then here we are, at fifteen. Older, physically, psychologically, and in terms of maturity. Learnt a lot. Went through I suppose, quite a lot too. There was OBS. SYF. BSP camp. FOA. Nice(: Great memories that I'd keep with me forever, especially for FOA night. It was awesome! Unbelievable. Oh, and there's NSC too. Wow, I seem to have done a lot this year O: Not to mention SMP. Haha. All abbreviations.
And so now we're at the September holidays, which are going to end soon in a flash, and then the EOYs will come. Technically, what I should be doing now is revising. Okay fine so I shall go to revise Math, bye(:
We fly free.back to top?
Friday, September 2, 2011 @ 8:40 PM
I don't really like the new blogger interface. It feels too foreign; it's too white and unfriendly. I'm using the old blogger interface now anyway.
A moment ago I suddenly had the inclination to blog. But that inclination went as fast as it came. And now I don't really feel like blogging. For one, the keyboard is too bouncy. And then, the television is such a huge distraction. Sigh. Should I go back to the Math 2001 EOY Paper 1? I reckon I should. Well then, bye.
By the way, I had an extremely awesome time last night with my ex-classmates of 6G'08 :D So nice! We sat outside Burger Shack and talked till 10.30. Then people had to go home, and I went home too. It's a good thing that my house is so near Bukit Timah Road. I got home in approximately 15 minutes, including the time taken to wait for the bus. Wait, scratch that, it should be 20 minutes. 15 minutes is really godly O: I really want to get together with them again): I've finally realised the pleasure in just getting together and hanging out with a group of people. That you haven't seen in a long time. That's not all girls too. Haha. It was until then that I realised I'm (we're) quite deprived 8D I've never really noticed before. I wasn't really caring that much, you know. But now that the time came, I just awoke from my stupor!
Okay, to be frank, there is nothing much wrong with being in a girls' school. I'm really quite used to it. But I'm quite thankful that I came from a mixed primary school too. So that I'd actually have some experience, you know. It should be quite sad if you have been in a single-sex school all along... You're missing out on quite a lot of stuff :x I'm not implying anything extra, but you know :D
Okay, I shall stop talking for now! I don't know what I'm going to do next. Okay, I shall go make pancakes for my mother and myself :D Good bye for now! I should really get my head on track and focus on what I should have to do. Yes. Okay then, tatas!back to top?
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Perfectionist streaks. Now Playing: Autumn Finds Winter - Yiruma Eating as a form of distraction One of those days A foggy world(?) Don't know why I'm writing this down We call everything on the ice, "love". A bit of self-observation, Plea for help So excited that I can barely breathe;